I (Carrot) am not a coffee drinker. I can appreciate the smell and the addiction, but in all honesty I cannot distinguish the taste of coffee from the taste of chewing on an aspirin wrapped in a dandelion stem. Coffee just doesn’t appeal to me.
That’s not to say cafes and coffee houses don’t appeal to me. I love tea, and hot chocolate, and vanilla fraps, and French sodas. I love the baked goods, and the ambiance as well. Let’s not forget about the free wi-fi, the people watching, and the white noise.
We have started and ended several climbing trips at Starbucks. In fact theDIHEDRAL held its very first meeting at a Starbucks. I was sipping a Chai the moment our Instagram account went live. One of our good friends has been working at Starbucks for years, and has helped me craft a signature drink. It is with that in mind that I asked some of the other members of the team to create and share their signature drinks as well.
The Philosopher Phrap – Coconut milk, matcha powder, banana, vanilla, whipped cream, sprinkled with cinnamon.
This drink is not only delicious, The Philosopher Phrap is also a powerhouse of antioxidants. It makes the bon vivant more philosophical in their approach to the moment. As the matcha increases brain function, the coconut milk replenishes electrolytes, and the banana blasts the body with vitamins. Sure, this drink has more sugar and calories than any sane human would rationally desire, but it’s a perfect treat after those big calorie burns. So the next time you pop into Starbucks post workout, treat yourself to a Philosopher Phrap. It’s the perfect mix of Phlavors Phor you, and without a doubt my Phavorite off menu item!
Gains Grind—protein powder, soy chocolate milk, banana, mint
I’m not really sure which ingredients Starbucks has, as I am almost exclusively a water drinker, but I feel like this beverage is an obvious winner. The key to getting gains is keeping it simple yet targeted, which this drink does. Protein powder is a must to help those muscles grow. Chocolate milk (from what I was told during my swimming years) is great after workouts, and the texture and taste of soy milk beats those of dairy milk any day of the week. We really don’t need to be cramping, so the potassium from the banana is a plus (pun intended)1. If there’s green stuff in it it doesn’t count as calories, so the mint is the clear choice as it (a) helps you digest better, (b) removes all guilt from consuming this drink, and (c) wakes you up just enough to finish your day. The Gains Grind has everything you need to get gains minus the stuff you don’t (like coffee).
Chicha, But Make It Healthy– Nut milk of choice, ground oatmeal, frozen banana, cinnamon, condensed milk
If you are Venezuelan or know of one, I’m sure that you have heard of Chicha at least once. It is the most delicious comfort drink there is! It is also a must beverage when having a cheat meal or day! Inspired by my favorite unhealthy drink of all time, I came up with a nutritious (minus one ingredient) version of it! Starbucks, embrace your latin costumers with this delicious drink! Mix ground raw or cooked oatmeal, a frozen banana, and nut milk of choice. Once the mixture is homogenous, garnish with cinnamon and condensed milk to taste. Sip and enjoy greatness!
- If you don’t get the pun, I suggest you review your metallic ions…perhaps group one on the periodic table can help…<3