Cereal is so good! Not all cereal of course, but in general cereal is about as good a thing as any human could ever desire! Cereal makes for the ideal climbing, hiking, biking, skiing, trekking snack.
Did you know the original cereal created in 1863 by vegetarian James Caleb Jackson was called granula? Granula was initially so hard that it had to be soaked overnight in milk in order to make it edible by the next day. Soon this idea of granula was pick up and renamed granola by Dr. John Harvey Kellogg (also a vegetarian). And as we all know granola makes for the ideal climbing, hiking, biking, skiing, trekking snack. Modern day granola and cereal have both evolved from the same ancestor, and for outdoorsy types, they serve the same purpose. Packable energy busts with sugary dopamine triggers that help move us from Point A to Point B. That combination of sweetness and crunch is Manna!
Did you know that C.W. Post a former patient of Dr. Kellogg’s developed his own cereal company called Post, and he named his first cereal Elijah’s Manna. Now if that’s not a statement of endorsement I don’t know what is. Of course, religious groups protested the name, and it was later changed, but the idea that cereal comes from the heavens could never be doubted!
Kellogg’s currently has a net worth of about 23 billion dollars, but Dr. James Kellogg was never in it for the money. He was trying to help a health crisis know as dyspepsia. Dyspepsia was believed to be an indigestion problem caused by eating too much heavy food. Kellogg’s solution to the wide spread problem of dyspepsia was what he referred to as “biologic living”. A lifestyle that included more exercise, better hygiene, and eating more grains and less meat.
Did you know that behind Kellogg’s “biologic living” was an ulterior motive to get Americans to stop masturbating? Kellogg was a religious man who believed “Highly seasoned [meats], stimulating sauces…and dainty tidbits in endless variety irritate [the] nerves and… react upon the sexual organs.” Masturbation is a carnal sin and should be avoided at all costs as the soul of America hangs in the balance. Kellogg had the answer – bland tidbits (as opposed to the dainty varity) made from graham flour soaked in milk. Cereal was thus created and promoted as means for healthy living, the elimination of “dainty tidbits”, and a cure for masturbation.
One could only imagine how exciting the backs of these early boxes of cereal were. I like to envision that the back of the very first box of Corn Flakes had a maze that led from a meat packing plant straight to hell. Maybe the first “prize inside” was a mouse trap that hangs from the button of ones trousers…you know, just in case the cereal didn’t do the trick.
It wouldn’t be until the 1950’s that cereal companies started promoting cereal as a sugary snack with the introduction of Frosted Flakes, and its mascots Tony the Tiger, Katy the Kangaroo, Elmo the Elephant, and Newt the Gnu! Not sure if it’s a genetic oddity, a coincidence, or just a result of 50 years of graham flour, but Tony and all the other mascots exist(ed) sans genitalia. I’m sure old John Harvey would approve!
In the 70 years since Tony was introduced, the cereal market has exploded. We’ve seen such magnificent advancements in the cereal universe that one may be inclined to think that the cereal has only been outdone by the creation of the internet. I’m not sure if that is true or not, but I can say that just over 100 years ago consumers had to soak dried broken graham flour in milk for 8 hours to avoid breaking their teeth, and now we have Cinnamon Toast Crunch. 70 years ago we had a genitalia-less tiger peddling anti-masturbation flakes for health and now we have…
We live in a world with Cinnamon Toast Crunch bars, milk, and popcorn. Cereal has come a long way. And who knows what it might be like in another 70-100 years, but as of now cereal truly makes for the ideal climbing, hiking, biking, skiing, and trekking snack.
Which leads me to wonder just which cereal is the best….Part II coming Saturday!