Dick Pics

Trigger Warning: Despite the cover image, this post is not about Richard “Tricky Dick” Nixon. It’s a discussion on penis photography, and the future of penis photography. It should be noted that this post and the writers at theDIHEDRAL are not fans of dick pics (please don’t send us photos of genitalia) and are adamantly against unsolicited dick pics.

Stats on dick pics (DP’s) are kind of all over the place, but if you are a female millennial or younger, chances are you’ve seen more dicks at your age than most women in any other generation have seen in their lifetime.

Females from the Millennial Generation and younger will see an average of 47 dicks a day, while women from the Greatest Generation saw an average 4 dicks per lifetime. While there is a decline in dicks per day as one ages, the prime dick pic receiving years will result in nearly 9,675,420 dick pics per lifetime. That is an increase of 9,675,416 dicks viewed per lifetime between the Greatest Generation and the Millennial Generation.

Now, while it’s important to note that the dicks per day stat is completely made up, it is also important to note that while 47 dicks/day seems high, it doesn’t seem impossible.

Stats on dicks per day are difficult to come by, in fact general stats on all DP’s are difficult to come by, but there have been some studies, and the results are not surprising. The stats below are from the popular 2018 yougov poll on dick pics regarding millennials aged 18-36.

• 46% of the women in this age group have received DP’s.
• 41% of the women in this age group have received unsolicited DP’s.
  • These numbers go up to 53% and 47% respectively for women between the ages of 18-24.
• 12% of the women in this age group have requested a DP.
• Of the 46% of women who have received a DP, 58% of these women think DP’s are gross, 54% think they are stupid, 38% find them sad, and only 13% find them pleasing. (Women could classify their responses into more than one category, e.g. a dick pick can be gross, sad, and stupid all at the same time.)
• 30% of the men in this age group were asked to send a DP.
• 22% of the men in this age group have sent a woman a DP.
• 5% of the men in this age group have sent a woman an unsolicited DP.

There are several things worth noting, especially the fact that the great majority of DP’s are unsolicited and unwanted. There is also the wild disparity between women who have received unsolicited DP’s vs. the men who have claimed to send unsolicited DP’s. 41% to 5%. To put this into perspective, if our dicks per lifetime numbers were correct, then, of the 9,675,420 DP’s received, 9,191,649 would be unsolicited (on average). Things like location, time, access to goods, and population will all effect the outcome of the actual numbers, but if we generalize from the yougov study to a particular population, the numbers would be staggering. If we consider US men from 18-34 , i.e. US millennials as of 2023, we’d be looking at 39.2 million people. Millennial women in the US add up to 37.6 million people. Again this is just a generalization, but if that generalization holds, it amounts to 15.4 million women between the ages of 18-34 who have received unsolicited DP’s.

Now, when we generalize from the study, the number of men who have sent unsolicited DP’s (5%) it amounts to 1,960,000 US men between the ages of 18-34. It’s safe to assume that of the 15.4 million women in the US between the ages of 18-34, most of them have received more than just 1 unsolicited DP, but if we stick with unrealistically conservative number of 3 DP per millennial woman, then we can see just how iffy/strange/concerning that 5% number actually is.

So, what is going on?

There are a several possibilities, two of which stand out. One possibility is that there is a serious problem with serial DP senders, if 5% of the people account for 100% of the problem then maybe we need to find a better deterrent. Another possibility is that people lie, there is a good chance that some men who are sending unsolicited DP’s aren’t admitting to it. And of course there is the most realistic possibility, namely that we are dealing with both liars and serial senders.

Beyond who is sending unsolicited DP’s there is the more pressing question of why.

Why are all these men sending unsolicited DP’s?

There is a lot more depth to this question than I am prepared to answer, but if we stick relatively close to the surface, three primary reasons come into light. People, in this case men, can be really dumb, really full of themselves, and really mean. According to a 2019 article in The Journal of Sex Research titled I’ll Show you Mine so You’ll Show Me Yours, researchers noted that the majority of unsolicited DP’s arise from a transactional mindset. Forget flowers, or conversation, poetry, or really anything else. These days it’s all about that D. If only the Troubadours had iPhones! Despite the majority of women thinking DP’s are gross and stupid, and despite no request, some dumb bastard is about to hit the send button because he thinks a picture of a penis, a picture of his penis is a romantic gesture that will result in reciprocation.

In addition to being dumb, it turns out that unsolicited DP senders tend to have an inflated sense of self-worth, in other words they have a tendency toward narcissism which comes with a desire to be admired by others. Concerning those who send photos of their penis in order to gain admiration, I am kind of worried. If one is looking for admiration, perhaps the penis isn’t the place to start? It may just be me, but in terms of beauty maybe try eyes, hair, hands, maybe a smile. Maybe try something less veiny, try something that isn’t a penis. I just can’t imagine anyone opening up their phone to a photo of a penis that they didn’t ask for or expect and then deciding ‘oh this is the one’! I’m pretty sure Narcissus himself had the frame of his reflection tilted a little higher than his twig and berries.

In addition to narcissism and stupidity, some senders are just jerks. About 1 in 10 unsolicited DP’s come from guys with hostile intentions. They use DP’s as a way of exerting power over the recipient. You know, it’s the really classy guys with great communication skills. It is tough to relate to people like this. In my angriest state, the thought of genital photography would be the furthest thought I could have. Could you imagine being angry with someone and landing on a DP as your ideal response. Folks who suffered from unrequited love used to write songs of scorn, they turned that energy into music, and poetry, and art.

Speaking of art, feminist and activist Whitney Bell turned all of the DP’s she received into an art exhibit called I Didn’t Ask For This: A Lifetime of Dick Pics in which she creatively displays a lifetime of DP’s. In this article from ELLE Whitney poignantly states: “Take a look at the hundreds of dicks and the lewd and threatening comments that accompany them. This is how little respect many men have for women. It’s time to stop sweeping aside our daily harassment as routine.”

Bell is right, and so let me offer some simple advice to those who are on the fence as to whether or not you should send a DP without consent. Don’t do it. Nobody cares about your penis. Instead, I recommend that you read a book, an important book. Maybe read Emerson or Mary Shelley, Bell Hooks could be good. Go on an adventure, try biking to the nearest country, or try rock climbing. Take a Lit class, perhaps a sociology class, or a philosophy class. You can try volunteering, spend a weekend with Habitat for Humanity or try reading one of your books to some new friends at a nursing home. After doing that you will have grown as a person. Maybe at that point you won’t have to depend on a predatory photo of your gross, stupid, sad penis to try and attract someone.

If you’re still on the fence, and you really really want to send a DP, then maybe try asking for permission. You could text something like ‘excuse me, I would like to send you a photograph of my penis, would that be okay with you?’ If the recipient is agreeable to your request then send away. If they are not agreeable, then pack it up for the night.

For those who ask for and receive permission to send a DP as well as those who receive a request for a DP, my only advice is to take a proper photo. It’s a miracle that anyone actually wants a picture of your penis, so don’t take that for granted. Investigate proper lighting techniques, watch a tutorial (HERE is a useful resource), maybe dress it up with a little tie and jacket, or shoot for an adventure style, a little harness and climbing rope might be fun. You’ve got permission to send a DP and that picture has to compete with nearly 9,675,420 other dick pics, so make sure you class that dangling fleshy Shrek toe up by putting in a little effort!