Hallow’s Climbers

Spooky season is here! Which means I will bombard you with Halloween-y posts you didn’t ask for. Like, have you ever wondered what kinda climbers those classic horror movie villains would be like? Of course you haven’t! But I don’t care

Freddy Krueger 

Freddy would be a great climber. Not because of his knife-like gloves but because he’s a cheat and lives in a literal dream world. I mean, he can literally extend his arms to make it to the next hold. Kinda ruins the point IMO, but it’s not like I’m gonna call him on it.

I truly hated writing that line, but I kept it anyway.


Jason is a pretty thicc individual, I can definitely see him as a boulderer. Lots of strength there. Of course, that lake is pretty much where he’s spent a lot of time so maybe he’d like some water soloing? 

This may be the most visually confusing drawing I’ve ever done, but I really wanted Jason doing a backwards swan dive with his machete, don’t @ me.


Michael is very persistent. He’ll trudge along at an even and steady pace. Very good for a climber. But I’m not sure about his belaying skills. Can’t really tell behind that blank mask, is he even paying attention??

Where’s your gri gri, man?

Who else could show their climbing skills? Chucky? Pinhead? Let me know in the comments! 

@chubbygirlclimbing is writing this on a high dose of NyQuil

3 Replies to “Hallow’s Climbers”

  1. Was thinking that all of the above would be OK for a day’s climb, but maybe not for a multi-day one. Just imagine you and Freddy alone on a narrow portaledge high on lonely route deep in the lonely mountains. At night. Hmmm…

    How about the Texas Chainsaw Massacre family? Plenty of folks to help belay and carry gear. And cleaning a route for you with a chainsaw – brilliant! And being from Texas, they’d have Hueco dialed in. But be sure to pack them a lunch, lest you become theirs. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

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