When you talk to a person who has Anxiety and Depression, you often will get the same story. It’s like wearing shoes made of concrete while hoping the glass steps don’t crumble underneath you. Often you obsess over ridiculous ideas and thoughts, constantly worrying about things no one else would even care about. You might feel like you’re experiencing a heart attack while just wanting to crawl in a ball and cry. Anxiety has a way of showing up when you least expect it. There has been plenty of times I was thirty feet up on a wall and started to have a panic attack, but I didn’t let go. I held on with everything left in me and pushed myself. Looking up and reminding myself to breathe with every move up. Because when you’re on the wall and you think there’s no way you could ever make it up, climb higher. By the time you send you’ll have forgotten why you even wanted to stop. All you’ll have left is the rush of a completed climb and determination to get right back on the wall!
Because when you’re on the wall and you think there’s no way you could ever make it up, climb higher.
You might ask why someone would ever go to a loud crowded gym if they’re experiencing a panic attack. The process of putting on my shoes, my harness, and even dipping my hands into my chalk bag are all in some way ceremonial for me. Mapping out a route from below, the rhythmic movements all help put myself in somewhat of a trance allowing me to refocus my brain on something realistic. Anxiety will always be in my life so I had to find a way to cope. I have always been an active person involving myself in many sports and activities. For me though climbing has always had its grip on my heart giving me what no therapist could ever. Silently I can give the wall all my problems and by the end of my time spent there I will come out better than I was before.
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